How do I describe it? It is unsettling, unnerving and definitely unwanted. It is a fear of failing and being told one more time that I'm not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough.
I had recently turned an old wine bottle into a lamp. I enjoyed the beautiful color as the sun shined through and decided to use the subject for practicing the manual settings on my camera. Knowing the risks, I placed it on an edge and took a few photos when a huge gust of wind came and knocked it over! Glass and oil went everywhere! Turns out the broken glass was beautiful for photographing.
I have a fear of failure. In my photography skills and nursing skills. It isn't motivating, it is hindering. The question always lingers... what if I fail? That is when the broken glass made me realize that, YES, we might fail when we try things! But even then, is it all that bad if we do? We can find beauty in our failures and like glass our brokenness can be made into something far beyond what we expected.
We find a new strength in ourselves and try again.
The name of the wine was "Relax"... well fitted to the situation/lesson.
I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.
Psalms 34:4
8 comments:
perfection causes all of us to fear failure. Only God is perfect, if i was perfect, then i could walk on water. thanks for all your encouragement. only 20 more weeks and my dream of getting my bsn is a reality. thanks for your encouragement to go after it.
What a great post! Love you babe so proud of you : )
Patrick
I think fear of failure must be the human condition - I don't know anyone who doesn't fight that fight. Yet your pictures really capture the beauty that can come out of brokenness....the Lord Jesus is the source of true strength and in Him we find the grace to meet any and all our challenges. Good reminder where our focus should be - look to Him - not inside ourselves or to others. I think we are designed with fearful tendencies for this very reason.... :)
~mn mom
Amen! We will definitely make tons of mistakes, but praise the Lord that He will use them to bring us back to Him, and though we make many plans, His counsel will always stand. :)
Beautiful.
Perfectly said.
You are lovely in the breaking.
You are not too much.
You are enough.
Because of Christ and His redeeming work!
How often do I let the negativity of "not being smart enough, not good enough" bring me down? It is these feelings that lead me to question all the things I have done in my life: my schooling, my parenting skills, even my faith! How dare I let the evil one into my head! I am learning to love my imperfections, my awkwardness, and my short-comings, to know that these are part of who God made me to be. Like your wine bottle, I'm going to fall, break and have some pretty sharp edges, but the Refiner's Fire will melt the broken bits to form something wondrous and perfect. One day...
This one was great too! So true...God uses our failures to show His strength. It is so easy to get caught up in what we think we can't do and forget that all this time He is holding us in is His hand! Thanks friend!
bb...
I am actually going to use your foto tonight at MOPS -giving it away. It is beautiful foto but the leason of being brave in the mist of fear by what others think, lable or even our own lies (from the enemy) that hinders us to move forward. We may call them excusses but they are still lies. Thanks for posting this in 2011. Encourage you to keep on posting... love mums
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